Tonight Was ALL Kinds of Bad...

Sometimes you have good days... and sometimes you have bad days. Well, today was definitely a bad day!

It was good to have the past 2 days off from running. I think my body needed the rest - lots of soreness, and my joints have been aching. Oh the joys of running...

But tonight was "back to business." I needed to run 4 miles. I was a little nervous (of course), but I felt that if I kept it slow then things would be fine.

I should have known it was going to be bad when I was welcomed at the door by Captain Freakwad. If you're new to my blog, this is the guy that approached me about "working out" one night. He works at the gym, and man does he act like the biggest goober.

But I digress...

So after he greeted me and I basically just said "hey" and went on, I found an open treadmill. After a quick warmup (walking), I started the process.

The first mile was OK. I was a little sore, but I was taking it slow and I pushed on to mile 2. Things started to loosen up, and I felt pretty good... then mile 3 began.

Well, the chick that was running on the treadmill next to me left. Immediately someone hopped on... and I quickly "noticed" their prescence. Man oh man... if odors could kill, this guy would be a lethal weapon!

I'm not a big "fragrance" kind of dude. I don't wear cologne, and I never wear scented deodorant. Having said that, I will also admit that I'm keenly aware of perfumes and other pungent smells. So for me to describe this guy can only be described as someone who bathed in Old Spice prior to coming to the gym.

My gosh... and to make matters worse, he was wearing a sleeveless shirt! There was NO barrier between his pits and my nose! It was like running in a fog... or trying to gasp for breath and you're trapped in a gas chamber!

For the next mile, I battled... I thought, "Maybe if I run with my nose pointed to the left, I can catch some clean snorts of air. Nope... that wouldn't work... I think I was enveloped in his personal cloud of doom and death!

As I came up to the end of mile 3, I thought "maybe I'll just quit." I mean, seriously... I couldn't breathe! However, I knew that I had to run 4... that was on the schedule, and Chandra was doing the same thing.

Mile 4 was a blur. I think I was getting woozy. The more he ran, the more he perspired. Which meant the more crappy air coming out of his Old Spice factory. It was a brutal last mile. I literally would try and count, "Nine tenths... eight tenths... seven tenths remaining..."

And not only was I fighting Commander McSmell, but this was one of my toughest weeks at work. It's hard to explain, but I have a few weeks every few months where things are very intense. And this, my friends, was one of those weeks. I think the stresses, the lack of sleep, and the air I was breathing contributed to the difficulty of the night.

Mile 4 finally ended... and I can't tell you how excited I was. And wouldn't you know it? As soon as it was over, he had departed. I couldn't believe it...

I hope I never run next to that guy again. To borrow a line from the Simpsons: I should have just yelled out to him, "Smell you later!"