A 39er Looks at 40...

Sweet Merciful Crap I'm Almost 40!!!!

Today is my birthday. There... I said it. For those that know me, I never advertise this date. To me, it's just another day of the year. Why do we need to celebrate?

However... maybe that "attitude" needs a little adjustment. Besides, it's a lucky day... 09/09/09!

I think we can all agree that I've had one crazy-ass year... Especially from a physicality standpoint! I keep telling people that you haven't lived until you've created 2 separate kneecaps... and blasted both pieces into different parts of your body!

"Hey, is that your muscle?"
"No... that's my kneecap."

But, I digress...

One thing it taught me is that life is precious... as strange as that sounds coming from me. Actually, it's even more simple than that: "Life" is a true gift each and every day.

Now I don't mean to say that I was at death's door... far from it. But when I use the term "life," it means "the normal activities that each of us go through on a daily basis."

Have you ever thought about that... meaning, what if your "life" was taken away? How would you react? How would you respond? How would you cope?

I don't start off my day thinking, "Woe is me... my knee hurts and I hate my life." Actually, it's not until step number 2 that I realize I have a problem with my knee. Not sure why, but it's just a "surprise" each and every morning (You'd think I'd be used to this by now).

But, what I'm saying is, "don't dwell on the negative or it will BECOME your life."

But, I digress...

I've found myself reflecting on the past and looking towards the future today. While I was 38, the following things happened: I introduced 2 friends who eventually got married, I came in 172 out of over 25,000 participants in an online football "pick em" challenge on Sports Illustrated (proud of that!), I changed jobs within my company, I refi'd my house, I improved my house, I finally put up a Christmas tree, I rode in my first ambulance, I met my neighbor (after 8 years!), I lost a lot of weight, I gained it all back, I re-discovered my passion for writing, I helped a stranger, and I became even closer to my family and friends.

I think, overall, it wasn't a bad year... And you know what? That little event that happened back in April actually enhanced my year... my life, actually. Because of that, it changed my perspective on a lot of things. My attitude... my experiences... lots of blessings (gifts) can be traced back to that moment when I was lying on that pavement wondering, "What the heck is wrong with my knee???"

But, I digress...

So... what do I want to happen in my 40's? Or, more specifically... in "year 40?" Good question...

I'd like to finally write a book. I'm serious... I've said it a million times, but I feel I have the ability to put something down on paper that is of meaning to someone. I've got several topics floating around in my head... I just need to pick one and get after it! Hopefully, when the clock strikes 4-0, I can say, "DONE!"

I'm hoping to pick up "exercise" again. Once I have the next surgery (removal of the wires) in either November or December, I'd like to get movin' again. People ask me over and over, "Do you think you'll ever run again?" My hope is "Yes." However, I don't know what that knee will take... at the very least, I'd like to take up biking.

I want to continue to transform my house into a home. Along with the improvements you've seen, there are other aesthetic touches I'd like to do... as well as some major changes to the central heat/air, appliances, etc. Time and money... don't we all need more of that???

And finally, this may come as a shock to some of you, but I think I'm opening up to the idea of dating again. It's been a long time... and I think I've cleared my head enough to know that I'm warming to the notion of opening myself up to "that." We'll see... if you're reading this and thinking, "I've got the PERFECT setup," let's just not go rushing into things. I'm like a bear coming out of the cave... I'm just opening up my eyes and taking a look around, so to speak.

Back to the knee: I want it to regain "normalcy" again. I want to walk without a limp/pain, I want it not to be swollen everyday, and I want to be able to put more weight on it without second-guessing, "Should I be doing this?" I want people not to worry about me and to stop asking me how the knee is doing... not because I'm being a grump, but because I want them to see me more as "Regular Joe" than "Gimpy McLimpy."

Oh yeah, and I want to travel and eat good food and drink fine beer and yada yada yada... Some things never change!

So there you go... the thoughts of a recently-aged 39-year-old as he now stares down the barrel of a Smith & Wesson 40.

As I toast the years - past/present/future... while enjoying the fruits of the barley of my Chimay Grand Reserve (blue) tonight, I want to end with "Thanks." Thanks for being there for me this year... Thanks for supporting me through the good and not-so-good... and Thanks for caring enough about my life to read this blog (and recommend it to your friends and family).

Let's hope 39 is even better than 38! :-)